Just a vent

I love the current neurologist. She's friendly, pro-active, and I can email her with my concerns.

AND....

She responds very quickly.

You just can't beat that.

The upcoming hospitalization is weighing on my mind, a lot.

I'm so glad that he will get an extensive EEG, MRI and PET scan. Finally we can truly determine where these seizures are coming from. You would think these tests would be automatic when someone is diagnosed.

I saw this statement on a website and I fully agree

Accurate localization of the focus of the seizure activity is critically important to determine treatment options.

I guess what is getting to me is that.... The Neuro mentioned surgery in our last appointment.

The email I got about Arthur's upcoming hospital stay said he was having

a PET scan and MRI because it's part of the pre-surgical work up.

There's that word again

SURGERY

I know surgery can not be forced on us. But it really freaks me out. To me, surgery is the LAST option.

Cutting into my child's head and taking out a piece or two....

is LAST on my list of treatment options

I've read plenty of stories of people who have had success and some who haven't.

I know that once your on AED #3 and up, the chances of the meds controlling the seizures

are pretty slim. I'm fully aware. But, that doesn't make me want to jump right to brain surgery.

UGH

On an even happier note....what if there's something wrong with his brain? 

What if some damage was done

when he was in the hospital as an infant, when he had open heart surgery?

What if there is a tumor in there and that's what has been causing the seizures?

What if?

It makes my heart hurt, makes me sick to my stomach.